


Doughnuts and Bonsais

by darkdisrepair



Category: DC's Legends of Tomorrow (TV)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-15
Updated: 2018-12-25
Packaged: 2019-09-17 06:01:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 8,673
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16969050
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/darkdisrepair/pseuds/darkdisrepair
Summary: charlie and zari bond over their mutual dislike of christmas parties. charlie finds it hard to resist a sick zari. things escalate when the team takes care of an aberration, only to discover that their 'solution' has more dire implications.





	1. Chapter 1

A warm golden glow filled the Waverider- a step away from the usual, bright lights that lit the time ship. Strands of twinkling fairy lights were also strung around the room, and a mini tree sat on the center console. All around the ship, garlands lined the walls and festive plant arrangements could be found on every spare table. Charlie had to admit- she was impressed with whoever decorated the ship. 

"Alright, Legends, we have approximately two minutes until the party starts!" Sara exclaimed to the gathered group. "Has everyone finished their assigned duties? Mick, has all the food been fabricated?"

Mick grunted in response, slugging back a sip of eggnog as he did so.

"I'll take that as a yes. What about you, Ray? Have you set up all the seating in the library, for later?" Sara turned to Ray.

"Yes, but I wasn't sure if we also needed the fleece blankets from the storage closet..."

"If that's all you have to do, go for it. You're dismissed, Ray. And you too, Mick. John, are the games all ready to go?"

John nodded. "There will be plenty of games to have, rest assured. I've set up a wide assortment, depending on the mood of the group. I stacked them in the corner."

"Excellent," Sara turned to Charlie. "Most of your responsibilities were for the invitations and such, so I'm just going to say this before everything gets too crazy... I'm glad you're on this team. I know sometimes I don't show it, and you're not always the one I'm focused on, but you've been a great addition. So I really hope you feel at home tonight. You're a Legend now, this party's for you, too."

"Well, don't get all sappy on me," Charlie said with a lopsided grin.

"And Zari-"

Sara froze, then scanned the bridge again. 

"Where's Zari?" Sara frowned. "I thought I called everyone to the bridge."

"Maybe she didn't hear. She's always playing loud, shitty music," Charlie said quickly.

"Well, see if you can find her. I need to check in with her for the movie, and make sure that everything all set up."

Charlie thought she had a good idea of where Zari was. 

* * *

 She stepped into Zari's room a little hesitantly, unsure of how she was going to be received. While she and Zari weren't the best of friends, necessarily, they'd been certainly more civil toward each other since the cat-Constantine-timeline incident. But Charlie had never, funnily enough, been in Zari's room. There were certain unspoken rules about privacy on board the Waverider- no one came into another person's room unless they were invited. 

Zari's room wasn't the most elaborately decorated of the bedrooms that Charlie had seen (Ray's was significantly more outfitted with space nerd posters). But it was so, so obviously  _Zari._ There was a stack of programming books on the bedside table, several old novels and a silver picture frame. A colorful fabric print hung on the wall above the blanket-covered bed. A pile of Zari's clothes sat in a corner of the room, while even more books were stacked neatly in another corner. 

"Do they need me to fix the ship?"

Charlie jumped a little. Zari was sitting on the small couch, her eyes fixed on the TV screen, controller in one hand. A glass of water and a box of tissues (decorated with Despicable Me characters, not that Charlie was noticing) sat on the table next to her. Unlike the others, there wasn't a speck of red or green on her clothes. Instead, she wore a loose, off-white sweater, black jeans, and fuzzy llama socks. Charlie opened her mouth to speak, but then changed her mind and flopped down beside Zari.

"Nah, the party's about to start. I've been looking for you." 

"Is that so?" Zari asked dryly, concentrating hard as she reached the third lap of Rainbow Road.

"Sara wants to know if you've set up the movie for tonight."

"It's in and ready, all she has to do is press play on the remote." Zari didn't take her eyes off the screen as she spoke. "You didn't need to haul yourself all the way down to my room to ask me that. You could have called."

"Well, I wanted to get away from Sara. She's really starting to get to me, what with all of her 'perfect hostess' talk. We all know it has to be  _perfect_ for Ava, but does she really need to rub in her amazing relationship in my face?"

Zari scrunched up her nose. "She's being like that again, huh?"

"It's exhausting. So, Mario Kart, huh? "I like it, but I'm not very good. Something about it doesn't click."

Zari didn't answer, just continued winding her way through the track. She was in second place, but closing quickly on the first place racer. Charlie couldn't help but root silently for Zari to win. She did- passing Mario in the nick of time, just at the finish line. 

Charlie offered Zari a high-five. To her surprise, Zari took it.

They were awkwardly silent, as the victory music played in the background. Then, Zari held out the other controller. "Do you wanna play?" she asked. 

"I told you, I'm not good. You don't want me playing with you."

"Well, you have to be bad before you're good," Zari reminded her. "And who said that you're playing with me? We're on opposite teams. Besides, it beats a boring party anyway. I'd much rather beat your ass in Mario Kart than sit around and chit chat with Mr. Heywood, bureaucrat extraordinaire."

"Well, when you put it like that..." Charlie took the controller. "But only if I can be Yoshi."

"You're walking a thin line," Zari warned. "Yoshi is mine, all-" The threat was lessened slightly when she was cut off by a sneeze- one of the most adorable sounds on the planet. She sounded, ironically, like a kitten. Despite her threats, when they reached the character selection menu, Zari picked Bowser Jr. instead of Yoshi. 

* * *

 They played Mario Kart for a long time, race after race. Slowly, Charlie stopped sucking quite so much and started getting in the top five or so every race. And, shockingly, Zari didn't make fun of her too much. Only when she turned the wrong direction and went sailing off a tree branch in Maple Treeway. 

Even though Charlie's blue team lost every tournament they raced, she had to admit, playing Mario Kart with Zari was fun. She admittedly hadn't been looking forward to socializing with people she barely knew, making awkward conversation and chatting about the weather. Despite all the time she'd spent on the Waverider, she still felt a little on the outs. 

After their fifth round of races, Charlie stood up.

"Where are you going?" Zari asked. Charlie thought she could sense a hint of sadness in Zari's deep brown eyes. 

"I'm getting snacks, you idiot. Gotta take advantage of that party food while it lasts, ya know? Plus, I need a break. My eyes are getting tired."

"Wimp," Zari teased as Charlie walked out the door. 

Sara gave her a weird look when she walked onto the bridge. The party was in full swing- Ava was there, and so was Mr. Heywood, Nora, Mona, and... Gary. Ugh. Most of them were seated at a table laden with food, including a ham, mashed potatoes, green beans, and the works. "Where've you been?" she asked. "I was starting to wonder if you'd taken off in the jumpship or something."

"Nah, I'm just not feeling it," Charlie said, as she grabbed a plate of colorful doughnuts and two mugs of steaming hot chocolate. "I'm gonna hang out in my room for a little."

Sara didn't seemed convinced, but thankfully, Nate distracted her before she could say much of anything else. "Well, if you want to join us, I think we're starting games soon."

A few seconds later, Charlie ducked back into Zari's room. Zari had grabbed a blanket from the bed. Her face lit up when she saw the doughnuts in Charlie's hands.

 _That's cute,_ Charlie thought. And it was. Zari's obsession with food in general was endearing- and Charlie couldn't even blame her. She knew what it felt like, to not have enough food all the time. But here on the Waverider, they could eat whatever they wanted.

"You're my favorite," Zari mumbled through a mouthful of powdered doughnut. Charlie laughed and took one for herself, too. They chewed in contented silence for a few minutes, just watching the animations dance across the TV screen. 

Once they'd eaten most of the doughnuts on the plate, they resumed their Mario Kart fest. Charlie was definitely getting better now- sometimes, she even found herself ahead of Zari. But only for a little bit, because Zari messed up a lot less than she did. And Zari was a tad bit more familiar with the tracks, since she'd been playing it for a few months before Charlie did. 

"So, is there a reason why you're not in the partying mood?" Charlie asked casually halfway through a race. "Most people get excited about stuff like this."

"I'm just not the Christmas type. It's not my thing, never has been. I guess I just don't like it getting rubbed in my face... not that I hate Christmas. I like that it makes people happy, but I guess I'm just not in the mood," Zari shrugged. She sneezed, sending her car spiraling off the edge. "And maybe I'm getting sick. Just maybe."

Charlie snorted.

"I should have told you before you spent all this time with me. You can leave, I wouldn't blame you."

If Zari hadn't looked so pitiful in that moment, Charlie would have laughed. "If I'm being honest? Never been sick. Shapeshifting kills all the harmful bacteria when I switch forms. When I had my powers, at least, I couldn't die, I couldn't get sick."

"You should definitely leave, then," Zari tilted her head to the side, a strand of dark hair falling into her eyes. "Your cells probably haven't built up any immunity to sicknesses. And trust me, getting sick sucks."

"I've lived for a long time, my cells have had plenty of time to build up immunity. Longer than yours. Just because I haven't gotten  _sick_ doesn't mean that I haven't encountered it before... it's called long-term exposure."

"Pretty sure that's not how science works, Char-" Zari turned away, sneezing into her elbow. "It's not how it works. I'm no scientist, but-"

"Clearly," Charlie said, motioning toward the doughnuts on the table. "Doughnuts aren't the best 'get well' food."

Zari snorted. "You're the one who brought them, you idiot."

"Well, now that I know, I'm going to be the responsible adult, and I'm going to take these from you," Charlie whisked the plate of doughnuts off the table and set them down on the floor near her feet. "No more doughnuts for you, until you feel better."

"I'm being a responsible adult!"

"You've literally been playing Mario Kart for, like, three hours with me. I don't think that exactly qualifies as adulting _._ Avoiding your problems, more like," Charlie teased, nudging Zari's shoulder. 

"I swear, if you mess me up, I'm gonna kill you, cold or no cold."

"Sorry."

Again, they fell into a comfortable silence, punctured only by Zari occasionally blowing her nose or a curse here and then from Charlie. 

* * *

A few rounds later, and Charlie could tell Zari was getting tired. She kept making more and more mistakes, to the point where Charlie was beating her in every race. And it wasn't that Charlie was extraordinarily good now. She wasn't. She fell off almost every race, and still managed to beat Zari. That was admittedly a little concerning.

"Let's take a break," Charlie said, gently removing the controller from Zari's hands. "Sorry to say this, Z, but you're not looking so great."

"I'm fine."

"We should at least make an appearance at the party. Just to say hi, grab some more snacks. Five minutes, just to keep Sara happy. We don't even have to stay there if you don't want to. Then we can come back, and decide what we're doing, then."

Zari rolled her eyes. "Fine." 

Together, they walked to the bridge, which was oddly empty. The lights were still on, but the table was vacant. The board games had clearly already been played- from the looks of it, whoever had been the yellow pieces in Sorry had destroyed everyone else. 

"Gideon, where are the others?" Charlie asked, tilting her head.

"Captain Lance and the others are in the library. I believe they are watching  _The Polar Express."_

"The Polar Express? Is that some sort of euphemism?" Zari asked, her forehead crinkled.

Charlie laughed. "You mean you've never seen  _The Polar Express?_ We've gotta go down there, then. It's time for you to get some education." Before she could even process what she was doing, she grabbed Zari's hand and pulled her down the hallway. 

The others looked up when Charlie and Zari walked in (no longer holding hands). 

"There you are," Sara said, a smile on her face. She was sitting next to Ava, her legs thrown over her girlfriend's lap. "There's not much room, but there's a whole ton of blankets and pillows and stuff if you don't mind sitting on the floor."

Charlie quickly gathered a few of the fluffiest blankets she could find, and a few pillows, too. She sat in front of Nora, who had her legs tucked up on the couch, and patted the spot beside her. Zari, after a brief second of hesitation, sat down next to Charlie and burrowed herself underneath a thick, blue blanket. 

The entire movie, Charlie couldn't ignore how close Zari was sitting, or how Zari's eyes kept closing, or how  _warm_ she felt. But it was nice to just sit, and not have to say anything, and just enjoy being next to Zari, and in the same room as the others. Occasionally, Mick commented on how stupid the character's decisions were, or Ray praised the 'excellent reindeer physics'. 

She didn't know how it happened, but halfway through, she looked down and realized, with a jolt, that over the course of the past forty minutes or so, Zari had fallen asleep.

She looked so peaceful, nestled between the blankets, her head almost completely in Charlie's lap. Her ponytail was beginning to unravel, and dark, chocolate brown strands of hair were falling across her face. Charlie slowly moved her arm, wrapping the blanket more tightly around Zari's shoulders. She gave her one last glance before returning her gaze to the screen.

* * *

 

With about twenty minutes left in the movie, Zari flinched in Charlie's lap, crying out a little in her sleep. Sara's gaze instantly snapped over to the two of them, frowning. 

 _Is she okay?_ Sara mouthed at Charlie, who shrugged. Zari had been sleeping peacefully, but now, she seemed restless, moving about every few seconds. Cautiously, Charlie put a cool hand on Zari's forehead, only to find that the brunette was burning up. Even though she wasn't  _that_ experienced in sicknesses, she did know enough to know that this was most certainly a fever. 

For the rest of the film, Charlie constantly checked Zari's temperature and adjusted the blankets, hoping that in the two minutes since the last time, that Zari's fever had started to wane. 

When  _The Polar Express_ was over, the lights automatically rose a little bit, and the spell that was usually cast during movies faded. Sara removed herself from Ava's arms and stood up.

"Alright, guys, it's Secret Santa time," she announced in a loud whisper. "You can get your gifts now, and we'll start the reveal."

Charlie gently shook Zari's shoulders. "I have to get up, Z, I'm sorry."

As Zari stirred, Nora climbed over Charlie, apologizing quietly as she did so. "I left my gift on the bridge, sorry."

Gary whipped out a large, messily wrapped bag from under his chair. "I've been waiting for this  _my whole life,"_ he exclaimed. 

"SHHH!"

"Guys, I'm awake," Zari said, rubbing her eyes. "No need to worry."

"You really should go to sleep," Charlie whispered. "Your forehead is burning up. I can get your gift and give it for you, if you want to go back to your room."

Zari waved Charlie off. "M'fine, I just needed a nap, that's all. I'll go get my gift now." With that, she stood up and walked out of the room, a little more unsteady on her feet than normal. 

Charlie hurried back to her room to find her Secret Santa gift, returning just as Nora and Zari were coming back with theirs. 

Two minutes later, everyone had gathered back in the library, arranged in a circle, this time. Charlie was sitting between Nora and Sara. 

It was interesting to look around the circle and see the varying sizes and styles of the gifts that people had brought. While Gary and Mona had brought large, colorfully wrapped presents, Zari and Sara both had packages that were more toned down. It looked like Zari had wrapped hers in old book pages and tied it with twine. Ray had an obnoxious reindeer-and-Santa themed wrapping paper, while Nora's was a dark navy with a white ribbon.

"Who wants to start?" Sara asked, surveying the circle. "No one? I'll begin, then."

She held out her bag to Nora. "You mentioned to me once that you really liked to travel... and since you'll probably be hanging around with us a lot, well," she said as Nora pulled a long poster from the tube.

It was a scratchable map of the world, with all the places Sara knew Nora had already gone already scratched off. And there was also candle with the scent of 'Star City."

"Thank you, Sara, this is wonderful."

"Just something to remind you of where you're going, and where it all began. I customized the candle with what I thought Star City smelled like, so I hope you like it. People can be weird about smells... if you don't like it, I still have the information." 

Nora cautiously opened the candle and sniffed it. "It's perfect, actually, so don't worry about it." She then put her map and candle away and stood up, handing the navy blue box to Ava.

Inside was a bookmark, with a clock charm. "Since you're the Director of the Time Bureau, and everything, you should probably keep in mind the time that counts. You can set it to whatever zone you want, but... with all that time travel, you've got to keep track of reality somehow. And I know you like to read."

"It's beautiful," Ava said, unable to keep the slight tone of surprise that colored her voice.

The circle went on- Ava gave Nate figurines of his favorite shows to put on his desk, Nate gave Mona a guide to magical creatures, and Mona gave Gary a bunch of quirky household utensils, until only Zari and Charlie hadn't exchanged gifts.

"Well, I guess we had each other," Charlie said, and held out the bag to Zari. "I didn't know what to get you, but..."

Inside, there were little bags and containers of baking ingredients, like eggs, flour, and vanilla, along with a dessert cookbook. 

"It's stupid, especially since we have a food fabricator, but I just thought-"

Zari shook her head. "No, it's a good idea. I'd love to bake with you sometime, but I'm warning you, I'm not great at it."

"Neither am I."

Then, Zari gave Charlie a bonsai tree, and a book on meditation.

"I know it's hard, to be the new team member sometimes, so I thought you might wand something to relax with, and center yourself. It's helped me a lot. It might not help you, but sometimes it's good to slow down. Not that you need it, but. I don't know. Being out of place, I know what that feels like, and nature just, it's different."

It wasn't something Charlie would have picked, but at the same time, it was hard to say no to the sleepy, hopeful look in Zari's eyes. Who knew? Maybe it would help Charlie work out some of her problems, after all. 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> charlie stays behind with zari while the rest of the team deal with an aberration in the timeline. the mission has unforeseen consequences.

While the anachronisms during the holidays had been blessedly absent, a day after the party, an aberration appeared on the screens, ranked as a level 4. Sara called everyone to the bridge. 

"Alright, guys, we have a new mission."

"Finally," John said, rubbing his hands together. "Where are we heading off to this time?"

"Don't get too excited, it's only in 2017. Not that long ago. We'll head down there, find out what's up, and we'll bring it in. It'll be fun. We can ease into the New Year with a nice Level 4. And we don't even have to change clothes."

Charlie rolled her eyes. Sara was being oddly peppy about this mission- probably the holiday spirit had lightened her up a little bit. 

The same could not be said for Zari, who looked like she was half-asleep at the main console. Her face was still flushed. Little wisps of hair were coming loose from her ponytail.

"You know what, I think I'll sit this one out," Charlie said, her eyes fixed on Zari. "And I think that Zari should, too."

Sara's gaze snapped to look. "That's a good idea. Zari, you and Charlie are manning the ship. I want the Waverider to be ready to go as soon as we're done. I know I promised that you guys would get to have family time over the holidays, and I want you all to get back as soon as possible. The rest of you, let's get going. Get on your hipster boots, guys, we're traveling back to 2017."

John, Mick, Ray, and Sara headed off to the costume closet, leaving Charlie and Zari on the bridge. 

"You don't need to baby me," Zari grumbled, shooting daggers across the room at Charlie. "I can handle the ship on my own."

Charlie flopped down across from Zari, lounging back in her seat. "I'm not doing it for you, I'm doing it for my bonsai. Hugh is already looking quite sad, and since you're the one who trusted me with the thing, you're the one who's responsible for my success as a bonsai farmer."

That won a tired smile from Zari. "It's not called  _bonsai farming,_ you dummy. And did you seriously name your tree Hugh?" 

"An aristocratic name for a pompous tree. But Hugh really does need some help. He's looking a bit... peaky."

"Fine, then, I'll give you some freakin' bonsai farming lessons," Zari grumbled. "So much for me having faith in your gardening skills."

* * *

 The team was gone longer than Charlie thought they'd be gone. After visiting Hugh the Bonsai, and after Zari educated Charlie on 'bonsai farming', it was one o'clock. They ate lunch without everyone else- well, Charlie ate, and Zari played with her food. It took a half-hour of nagging until Charlie managed to at least convince Zari to drink some chamomile tea. 

They debated for a while between playing more Mario Kart and doing a puzzle. Charlie eventually picked a puzzle, because, quite frankly, she was sick of Mario Kart. Plus, puzzles were a tad more relaxing. It wasn't fun having to be constantly wary of flying shells and banana peels. 

Zari picked Spotify's iconic classical music playlist to play in the background as they started working on the puzzle Charlie'd chosen- a Harry Potter one, of Hogwarts. While Charlie instantly gravitated toward located all of the edge pieces, Zari started picking out the sky pieces.

They worked in silence together for a few minutes. It was interesting how, before their Mario Kart session the other day, Charlie always felt the need to fill the quiet with conversation when she was with Zari. Now, she was perfectly happy to listen to the music without talking.

"So, you're a Harry Potter fan now?" Zari asked, after the Moonlight Sonata finished playing. 

"I've been a Harry Potter fan for a long time, not just recently. Plus, it's a good puzzle. Either way."

"Gryffindor, I'm guessing?"

"Slytherin, actually. What's your house?" Charlie asked curiously. She could see Zari in almost all of the houses. Even though she was just recently getting to know Zari in a friendly way, she could tell a lot from Zari's interactions with others. 

"I don't know, I've never found out. They don't like literature in 2042, especially Harry Potter. It encourages witchcraft and rituals, according to ARGUS. I've been trying to read them over the holidays, but..."

Charlie couldn't imagine a world without literature. In every time she'd lived in, literature was a big deal. "Don't tell me you're a Harry Potter hater."

"I tried for hours last night," Zari said, shaking her head. "I like it, but I can't get through it. Maybe when I'm better, it'll be easier. I'm almost to the end of the first book."

"Too scary for you?" Charlie teased.

"No, I was getting motion sick, actually," Zari admitted. "It's never happened to me before, but I'm not going to lie, it freaked me out a little."

"Well, since you don't know your house, you can take the test now."

Charlie fetched her laptop from her room and set it down in front of Zari. After making her way through the website, and managing to create an account, Zari finally managed to reach the sorting test while Charlie switched the classical music playlist to the Harry Potter soundtracks. 

She was content to watch Zari navigate the questions. She didn't want to influence any decisions, so she stayed quiet, with her head propped up on one hand, eyes following the cursor on the screen. 

Halfway through the test, Zari started coughing. Violently.

"Are you okay?" Charlie asked worriedly, immediately alert. Zari couldn't speak, but she nodded her head. When the coughing didn't stop, Charlie darted to the sink, where she filled a glass with water. She turned around, only to spot Zari, her hands held out in front of her, eyes wide, her face deathly white. 

_"Zari?"_

Charlie's brain couldn't process where the red in the hacker's hands came from. The glass slipped from her hands, the sound of shattering glass snapping her back to reality. 

Blood. Zari was coughing up blood. 


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the team deals with the aftermath of zari's illness.

The Waverider, for the three days after the mission, felt oddly quiet. Usually, Ray was surrounded on two sides by loud music- both Zari and Charlie loved to blast various genres at almost any time of day. But now, only Charlie's music pounded on Ray's bedroom walls. 

Every time Ray walked past Zari's room, he expected to look in and see her at the TV or the computer, headphones on. But her room stayed depressingly dark, empty. He missed her witty, sarcastic comments and smart-alecky jokes. 

The rest of the team had gotten back from the mission to find Charlie on the verge of a freak-out, hands covered in what looked like blood. Once Sara managed to calm the shapeshifter down enough, they learned that it  _was_ blood. Zari's. 

Her condition only continued to deteriorate that night. She was unable to eat much of anything at dinner, and then, on the way to the bathroom, Mick found Zari on the floor of her room, unconscious, white as a ghost. Ray never thought he'd see Mick panic, until Mick burst into Ray's room, yelling at him to fix Zari.

They'd had to put her on a ventilator. Mick stayed up all night to haul a couch into the medical bay, so that Zari wouldn't have to stay in those horrible, uncomfortable chairs that they usually used. He'd even piled the couch with blankets, and put on that one classical music playlist that Zari listened to.

Activity in the Waverider now centered around the medical bay and Zari. Sara tasked John and Ray on figuring out what was wrong with Zari. She didn't even have to tell Charlie and Mick to watch over Zari. At all times of the day, it seemed like one of them was in there. Mick just sat with her with his typewriter, clicking away. He pretended not to watch her, but Ray knew that one eye was always fixed on the monitor. Charlie brought stacks of puzzles and books into the medical bay with her, and sat at Zari's side, quietly making her way through piece after piece, page after page. 

But as hard as he tried, Ray just couldn't figure out what was wrong with his friend. He tested her blood for every disease in the book; he even reached out to the Time Bureau, to see if there were any historical diseases that Zari could have contracted during a mission. But there was nothing that seemed to fit her symptoms. It all seemed so sudden, so random. She'd just had a mild cold before Christmas. There was nothing unusual about that. But three days ago, it seemed like her body was on the verge of completely breaking down.

And it still was. 

Ray might even say that she was dying.

But he didn't want to. He didn't want it to be true.  _She was fine,_ he kept saying to himself. Serious diseases could manifest quickly, sure, but even those didn't quite fit what was happening to Zari. And considering that all the Legends underwent routine medical checkups twice a month, he should have caught it before now.

It almost seemed like... it almost seemed like cancer. Zari's cells seemed to be turning on each other, dismantling one another, destroying one another. That explained the blood in Zari's lungs, and why she was so weak that day.

Something else was behind this. If only Ray could just figure it out.

He spent all day in the lab, resisting the urge to visit Zari, stopping himself from taking too many breaks. His friend's life was at stake. If she died, it was all his fault. He couldn't let that happen. 

"Ray?" 

It was Sara, standing in the door of the lab, a small box in her hands. 

"Sara. Is- is it--?"

"No, it's not Zari. She's... the same. Charlie's with her now. I think she's reading to her, or something like that. I came here for you. You need a break," Sara said, sitting down opposite Ray. 

Ray shook his head. "I'm fine."

"You've been working nonstop."

"I can't stop now. What if..."

"Zari's not going to die, Ray," Sara interrupted fiercely. "I'm not gonna let that happen. But I'm not going to stand here and watch you run yourself into the ground. She wouldn't want you to."

"If I don't save her, no one else will."

"That's not true. We'll do it together, like we always do. She's going to be okay. You're not, if you don't get some sleep, and relax. Just for an hour or two. Then you can come back."

"And if she dies in that hour? What then, Sara?"

"I'll come get you if she gets worse again. But she's been stable for hours now."

"No," Ray shook his head.

Sara stood up, and pushed the container into his hands. "I thought you might say that."

Before Ray could even process what was going on, there was a flash of light, a flurry of movement, and he felt himself falling, falling, until he landed with a thunk on the cold, grey ground of...

The Time Bureau?

"Ray?!" 

_"Nora?"_

* * *

 

Nora. Sara had sent him to  _Nora._

"What are you doing here?" Nora demanded, tossing her book onto the chair. "How did you get here? Does the Time Bureau know that you're here?"

Ray rubbed the back of his head sheepishly. "I don't know, Sara sent me.

Nora crossed her arms across her chest. "Sara Lance sent you here, to her enemy's daughter?"

"I need to get back. I need to get back to the Waverider, now," Ray said, standing up. He paced around the room, studying the control panels. "Please tell me how to get out of here. You've been here long enough to find out."

"Is something happening with Sara?"

"Not with Sara. Zari."

"Back to her old time travel trick, or-?" Nora stopped when she saw the expression on Ray's face. "It's something else, isn't it."

Ray turned back to the control panel, unable to look Nora in the eye. "Zari's dying."

Silence. 

"Zari's dying, Nora, and I don't know how to stop it, and everyone's looking at me, and I don't have answers because I don't even know why she's dying. Sara expects me to find something, or do something, but I've checked my data so many times. Nothing makes sense anymore! The numbers don't add up, it's like nothing I've ever seen before. It's like whatever Zari has evolved-"

Ray stopped, turning slowly back around to face Nora.

"It's evolved," he repeated, turning the words over in his mind. "It's  _evolved."_

"I'm guessing you figured something out," Nora commented dryly. Ray nodded slowly. 

The door slid open. Ray wheeled around as Ava walked through the door.

"Ava, what a surpri-"

"I'm glad you got what you were looking for, Mr. Palmer," Ava said briskly, as she turned on her Time Courier. "Sara will be happy to know that her plan worked."

"Wait, you're sending me home?"

"Of course. After all, I believe you have some work to do."

Just as Ray was about to step through Ava's portal, he turned back and shoved the container through the barrier at Nora. "Take these."

"What are they?" Nora called.

"Doughnuts. Zari would want you to have them."

 


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the team continues to work to save zari, and sara notices things.

Sara couldn't stop herself from walking past the medical bay, even though a half-hour was not enough time for anything to have happened. Zari seemed to have stabilized, for now, at least. But it would be impossible to take her off the ventilator. According to Gideon, Zari's body was struggling to function properly, let alone breathe on its own. 

Believe it or not, Sara missed Zari's presence at the dinner table. While they may not have gotten off on the right foot at first, Zari had definitely grown on her in the time since. She'd grown up, and actually started taking responsibility for the Legends. She was no longer the reckless hacker from before. 

Sara paused in the doorway of the medical bay.

Charlie was slumped at Zari's side, asleep, her head propped on her hand, one elbow on the edge of the couch. With much convincing, Ray had agreed to use the couch rather than the chairs, even though he'd called the couch unsanitary at first. 

A worn book lay, half-open in front of Charlie, like she'd been reading but fallen asleep before she could close the book. From the font, Sara guessed that it was Harry Potter. The shapeshifter looked worn. Her hair was coming loose from her updo, and her clothes were wrinkled. 

Sara padded gently over to the other chair, trying not to wake Charlie. But she was unsuccessful- Charlie stirred, then sat up.

"It's alright," Sara said softly. "I just came to see her."

Charlie ran a hand through her mussed hair, then closed the book in front of her. Harry Potter. Sara had been right. "Where's Ray, and the others? Have they found anything yet?" 

"No, not yet. But I sent Ray over to Nora, so I'm hoping that we'll have something soon. I think he just needs someone to talk to, a change in scenery. He was spending all day cooped up in that lab of his."

"He'd better come up with something, or I'll smack him into having some sense," Charlie grumbled. 

"Didn't know you cared so much," Sara commented.

Charlie looked down at the book in her lap, then back up at Sara. "I don't. I mean, I didn't. I mean, I don't know," she said, her cheeks flushing a little bit. "I don't know what to think anymore. Every time I think I know what I want, what I think, something happens that makes me second guess. Just when I figured out how to deal without my powers, I got them back. And then you Legends took them away again. And now-"

"Now what?"

"Things are different now. Maybe the Legends aren't so bad."

"Even with the shared bathroom? Wow, I'm impressed," Sara smirked. 

"You do have your enjoyable qualities, and... your not so enjoyable qualities."

Sara and Charlie's attention jolted to the heart rate monitor. Zari's blood pressure was rising, and she was beginning to shake violently.

"Gideon, run another scan," Charlie ordered, as she tucked the blankets closer around Zari. Sara's eyes narrowed as she watched Charlie fuss over the hacker, smoothing the hair back from Zari's eyes, whispering soothingly in Zari's ear. Her hands were gentle as she leaned over Zari, fluffing the pillows around her head and adjusting the little cat stuffed animal that someone had put on the arm of the couch. 

Sara even though she saw Charlie press her lips to Zari's forehead, only for the briefest of seconds before turning her attention to Gideon. 

"Miss Tomaz's heart seems to be working overtime to compensate for the rest of her body. I am afraid if this continues for much longer, her heart will overload from the additional pressure."

Sara and Charlie exchanged glances.

Ray really needed to come up with something, and fast. 

 


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ray is devastated when he figures out what's wrong with zari.

Talking to Nora had given Ray what he needed. Rather than being sick, there could be something more complex going on in Zari's body. Something that wasn't supposed to even exist. He'd been looking at historic and future illnesses, but he hadn't considered what would happen if there was an aberration...

He told Gideon to scan time for any aberrations that had occurred recently, from the end of December to now. 

Sara walked in on Ray nervously pacing back and forth as Gideon analyzed. He didn't know if this would work. It could just be a random, new strain of some kind of virus. But Zari's illness seemed too aggressive. It was killing her too effectively, almost like it had been planned.

"What's going on?" Sara demanded, her eyes tracking the progress of Gideon's scan. "Why are you so nervous?"

"I think I might know what's wrong with Zari. Rather than it being an actual illness, I think that what's going on may have been brought about by an aberration. Gideon's scanning for possibilities."

"Didn't the Time Bureau already look for anything that could have changed Zari's past? They didn't find anything."

"We were looking for illnesses specifically. Now, I'm just looking for the catalyst. Anything out of place, that shouldn't be there. Maybe a scientist in the future died, or something like that. Maybe she has this illness because they couldn't prevent it, and it's happening now because the aberration just occurred."

Sara didn't say anything after that. Her eyes were glued to the computer screen, as calculations filtered past. 

"There are three aberrations that have occurred within the last two weeks," Gideon announced after what seemed like an eternity. "I721, 1842, and 2017."

"I thought we took care of the aberration in 2017," Sara said, stepping closer to the screen. 

Ray started pacing again, his eyes occasionally looking back up at the screen. "We did, so it can't be 2017."

"Actually, Dr. Palmer, the butterfly effects of your actions in 2017 have resulted in a shift that traces all the way through 2042."

The sound of Ray's footsteps on the floor stopped. "What do you mean, my actions? The team did it together."

"The fugitive you stabilized escaped from custody three years later, in 2020, but was captured by A.R.G.U.S. officers. Through years of experimentation, ARGUS developed a drug based on your serum that was meant to strip powers away from metahumans."

"W-what do you mean, the fugitive was captured?"

Sara sighed, running a hand through her hair. "When we decided against sending that shapeshifter to Hell, we made the aberration worse. We just never thought to check, because-"

"Because usually prison works good enough. And my work..."

"Your work, Dr. Palmer, gave the ARGUS scientists what they were missing in our timeline," Gideon said. It sounded like Gideon was mad at Ray. Which had never happened before. Ray wasn't even sure that Gideon could even get angry...

"And so when Zari was captured by ARGUS..."

Sara's hands balled into fists. "They tried to take away her powers. They must have injected her with it before taking her away. And she only started dying when the aberration occurred."

"So this is all my fault. If I hadn't stabilized that shapeshifter's powers, then ARGUS would never have been able to do this to Zari. I'm the one who's killing her," Ray breathed, his face white. 

He swept his hand across his lab table, sending beakers flying everywhere.  _"DAMN IT!"_

 

 

"It's not your fault," Sara told him, crossing her arms. "You couldn't have known what was going to happen. All we need to do is go back in time and change what we did. We can send the shapeshifter to Hell and then ARGUS will never be able to hurt Zari."

"It is my fault, and you know it. Even if we go back, it's not like she's going to get better instantly. Because of me, Zari could  _die,_ Sara."

"Ray-"

But it was too late. Ray had already turned on his heel and stormed out of the lab. 


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the team travels back to 2017 in an attempt to save zari.

There were two ways to save Zari. The first was to send the shapeshifter to Hell, and eliminate any possibility of escape. But that would also condemn the shapeshifter, without a second chance. Sara hoped that things wouldn't come down to that. The second option, and the one that Sara preferred, was stopping Ray from inventing his serum in the first place. Then, the shapeshifter could carry on living without risking Zari's life.

Before leaving for 2017, Sara visited the medical bay, intent on telling Charlie about the potential solutions.

She heard voices from down the hall; for one brief, thrilling second, Sara thought Zari's condition had improved. When she reached the doorway, she learned it was something else entirely. 

The worn, beloved copy of Harry Potter was open on Charlie's lap as she read aloud to Zari, her voice soft. Music played in the background- after a few seconds, Sara recognized the song as one of the ones from the classical music playlist that Zari was so oddly obsessed with. 

Sara stood there for a few minutes, drinking in the sight. Charlie was so unbelievably gentle with Zari, as she smoothed the hair off Zari's forehead and adjusted the blankets. Sara had never seen Charlie like this with anyone, not even her old punk friends. Even as she read, Charlie would occasionally pause to glance at the monitor, or ask Gideon to perform another scan, or if Zari looked like she was getting cold.

It would be rude, Sara thought, to interrupt them. 

She wrenched herself away from the medical bay with a silent promise- she would save Zari. And she would do it, if possible, without sending Charlie's fellow shapeshifter to Hell. 

The old Sara would have had no hesitations about trading Zari's life for the shapeshifter's. After all, Zari was part of the team, and the shapeshifter wasn't. But now it was different. Even if she didn't want to admit it, keeping Charlie on the team had been a good idea. If there was anything she'd learned from Zari's refusal to send Charlie to Hell, it was that everyone deserved at least a chance to prove themselves.

The real question was, how could she stabilize the other shapeshifter's powers without getting Zari killed?

Ray heard Sara's footsteps entering the jumpship and turned from the controls. He looked like a mess, with tousled hair and deep bags under his eyes. It was like Ray had aged in the hour that he and Sara had last seen each other. 

John and Mick were already there. John was pacing, muttering an incantation that Sara recognized as the one that he used to conjure up the portal to Hell. 

"Finally," John said, throwing his hands up in the air. "We've been waiting for you for forever. What took you so bloody long?"

"We're ready to go," Sara said, closing the jumpship doors. "2017, here we come."

"Wait, we're not stopping myself from making the serum?" Ray demanded, when he saw their destination flashing on the screen. "Sara, this is exactly why we're in this predicament in the first place! I'm the reason why Zari is-"

He broke off, unable to say the words. "You can't let me make that serum."

"Like it or not, it's happening. I want to save as many lives as possible, not ruin them," Sara said as she piloted the jumpship. "Including the shapeshifter's. I want to give them back their powers."

 "That will  _kill Zari._ Do you not understand how this is supposed to go?!"

"I understand perfectly," Sara said coldly. "We give the shapeshifter the serum. Then, we send them off somewhere where ARGUS can't find them. The past, for example. They can live their life there without worrying about being captured, and we don't have to worry about ARGUS getting their hands on your serum."

Ray groaned, running a hand through his hair. "There are so many flaws in this plan, Sara. What if someone else gets their hands on the serum? It could be just as deadly, and just because ARGUS is chasing them in 2017 doesn't mean that they can't chase the shapeshifter two years before 2017, either!"

"So we'll go even farther back. To the colonial times, or even before that."

"The serum needs to be  _destroyed!_ How could you even think of letting me do it, knowing what it can do? What it will do? Our friend is DYING!" Ray shouted, slamming his fist down on the control panel. 

"It's not that simple, Ray."

"It's Zari's life, or the shapeshifter's. Seems pretty simple to me."

"Do you even hear yourself talking? Since when do Legends kill innocent people? Since when do we 'shoot first, ask questions later?'" John demanded, standing up and facing Ray. "I thought you were better than that. I thought you believed in second chances, especially considering your relationship with a certain Nora D-"

"Don't you dare bring Nora into this," Ray spat, turning on John. 

"How is she any different? How is Charlie? Why is it suddenly so important to you that this shapeshifter goes to Hell? You were willing to cut corners for Nora, so why not them?" Sara challenged. 

"I'm not about to risk the life of one of my friends to restore powers to a random shapeshifter. I don't care how much they're like Nora, or Charlie, or you, or me. I don't fucking care, Sara. It's my fault that this is happening, so I'm going to make damn well sure that it doesn't get-"

"Incoming transmission from Director Sharpe," Gideon announced, cutting Ray off mid-rant. Sara took a deep, calming breath.

"Put her on."

Ava's face appeared. She looked grave. "Sara, Ray, Mick, John. The scanners at the Time Bureau have just picked up a massive alteration to the timeline, and... I can only guess what this means."

"What do you mean, massive alteration?" Sara demanded.

As soon as the words came out of her mouth, she felt a massive timequake hit the jumpship, sending Mick and John sprawling onto the floor.

"What was that?" Mick grunted, sourly picking himself off the ground.

Ava cleared her throat, and as she did so, Sara finally realized that the reason why Ava's eyes looked bluer than normal was because they were filled with tears. "I'm sorry, Sara, I thought you knew."

"Zari's gone."


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> is it too late to save zari?

Zari was dead. Three hours ago, her heart stopped beating. She was long past revival of the conventional sort. Charlie hadn't known how to process Zari's death. She couldn't even imagine being a Legend without the witty, snarky, bright,  _beautiful_ Zari, who was so pure, so good, so heartbreakingly  _perfect._ She couldn't imagine dressing up in those silly costumes without her, or the late-night pizza celebrations without her. 

Charlie realized then that she loved Zari, loved her nerdiness, her smile, her laugh. How she wished she could see Zari laugh one more time. 

God, it was so stupid that she hadn't figured this out sooner. How much time could they have had together if Charlie hadn't been so stubborn? How many opportunities had they lost because of the stupidity of  _feelings?_

Never before had Charlie put so much faith in a group of people. But sitting by Zari's side, holding her hand, listening to that agonizing flatline, Charlie found herself hoping against hope that the Legends would pull through. That they would succeed. 

She didn't know what she would do if they didn't.

And then, like in a dream, a beep jolted Charlie out of the depths of her thoughts. Her attention jerked to the monitor. It was slow at first, almost non-existent, but gradually, the beeping grew stronger and stronger.

Charlie let out a choked sort of sob, then buried her face in her hands.

"Thank you for not giving up on me, Z," she whispered.

* * *

 A week later, Charlie dragged herself out of bed with a groan. She'd sat by Zari's side for days on end, until finally Sara had forced her to take a shower and sleep in her own bed for a change. And as much as Charlie hated when Sara was right, sleeping on an actual mattress had been heaven.

Charlie pulled on her most comfortable outfit and trudged over to make herself some breakfast- out of habit, she asked Gideon to make herself a stack of fluffy pancakes, with whipped cream.

"You going to save some for me?"

The plate of pancakes dropped on the floor with a loud clatter as Charlie spun around. 

There, sitting next to Sara at the table, was Zari, pale and tired looking, but with a smile on her face. 

"You really had to wake up at the one time that I wasn't there, didn't you?" Charlie answered, crossing her arms over her chest. "You ungrateful little demon. After all of that drama, you could have at least had the decency to get up when I was there to see it."

"Sorry," Zari said. "Guess we can't always get what you want."

As she walked over to the table, Charlie didn't miss how Sara turned her gaze away, or how Zari looked down at her hands, like she was  _afraid._ Ignoring both of them, she threw her arms around Zari, hugging her tightly, burying her face in that  _stupid_ red flannel that she'd been staring at for weeks-

"Don't  _ever_ do something like that again," she murmured in Zari's ear. "I was so scared, Z."

"I'm sorry, Charlie. I didn't want to scare you. I tried so hard, to get better. I didn't know it was that bad, but I was just so tired, and I didn't want to have to fight so hard anymore, and-"

"You don't need to apologize. Not to me. I'm glad you're better," Charlie said, pulling away, trying not to let Zari or Sara see the moisture that was forming in her eyes. 

"How's Hugh?"

Charlie laughed, wiping away her tears. "You literally  _died,_ and the first things you ask about are pancakes and bonsai trees."

"I do have my priorities," Zari said dryly. 

"Hugh's doing okay. But I think he missed you a lot. You mean a lot to him, you know. He got used to having you around to take care of him, and when you weren't there, he kinda fell apart."

"Well, I'm here now," Zari said softly. "And I plan on sticking around."


End file.
